she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I wear drunk well.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
