No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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