Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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