Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
