Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
its liver damage thursday
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