My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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