it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize