How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
