and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
