nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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