Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
