So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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