have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
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i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
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Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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