based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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