Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
