I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize