so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
