I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i just google imaged poop.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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