Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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