just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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