after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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