So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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