this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
