I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize