So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
