She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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