i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
How many fucks given?
0.12846
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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