im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
