happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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