She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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