it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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