i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
