I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
