They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
50% drunk capacity currently
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
