The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
