While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
