Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been