You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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