I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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