Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
