i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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