Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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