I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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