And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
