I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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