I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
