I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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