Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
