Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
