And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
