Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize