Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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